Net Nanny Relaunched (with more Maikefengs)

Net Nanny was released from jail late last week.  The recording of a telephone conversation, tapped into by the JR Intelligence Unit (JIU) on Thursday, suggests that she had been jailed as a result of a power struggle some two weeks ago. The following is the wording of that extremely sensitive state secret phone conversation which apparently led to her release.

Hermit (yells): Shikezhunbeizhe!

Good Ganbu

Good Ganbu

Good Ganbu: Good morning, Comrade. Did you get the news that Comrade Nanny is in jail?

Hermit: Yes I did. Must be a terrible blow to that conceited ugly crow. But well deserved, anyway.

Good Ganbu: Not so fast, Comrade Hermit…

Hermit: GULP!

Good Ganbu: She didn’t read that Californian porn magazine on a public bus for the whole world to see, right?

Hermit: Hardly so. she never socializes with the masses, that much is true. Maybe she read it in the rear compartment of her Red Flag Review Car. She bought herself one in a silly attempt to look as good as our great chairman, but she isn’t working half as xinku as he does.

Good Ganbu: Actually, she didn’t buy it. Uhm… anyway, only you and I have seen her reading that decadent Californian magazine, right?

Hermit: Uhm… who knows? Someone must have handed it to her, right? What are you up to, revered old comrade? Isn’t my work 65 per cent good, and only 35 per cent bad?

Good Ganbu: Well, yes, but you see, it is still 35 per cent bad. Even excellent scientists like you can make mistakes. Your public and neimu dang’an‘s both inform me that you graduated from Shanzhai Normal University (山寨师范大学), Ledu (乐都), Qinghai province, fifteen years ago. You completed your doctoral thesis there one year later, and became a professor there in 1997.

Hermit the Scholarly Dragonfly

Hermit the Scholarly Dragonfly

Hermit: Of course! It is one of our nation’s most acclaimed universities!

Good Ganbu: Ahem… listen, Comrade: our beloved motherland is developing at an unprecedented speed. The world’s fastest trains take us to many places, and even where their victorious rails end, there are comfortable buses and Red Flag Review Cars which now take us to every corner of our motherland…

Hermit: OK, OK, what do you want, revered old Comrade?

Good Ganbu: Comrade Nanny will be released from jail tomorrow, and I expect no further anonymous letters to reach my office, with evil accusations and rumors, OK? The world is in turm0il, and us Comrades must stand together, and not allow our enemies to…

Hermit: Oh, I would never engage in schemes and …

Good Ganbu: Of course not. By the way, in future public appearances and neimu party seminars, Comrade Nanny will be afforded another maikefeng – you will continue to use only one maikefeng. Bye for now.

More maikefengs for Comrade Nanny restore Harmony and give back face to her.

More maikefengs for Comrade Nanny will restore the Harmony and give back face to her.

Hermit (yells): Shikezhunbeizhe!

[Good ganbu rings off. Hermit starts sobbing uncontrolledly.]

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