Net Nanny: CNN deserves a Bit of Encouragement

We´ll be there

Net Nanny: We´ll be there

Once again, JR is showing off all his ignorance, writing about so-called “censorship” in China. Bullshit. We only make sure that nobody’s feelings in our harmonious country get hurt. Besides, every child in JR’s own country gets censored when writing wrong answers to questions in a test. And every boss reprimands his underlings once in a while, even in the so-called “free world”.

If biased Western media make false and distorted presentations of the true China, we make sure that such botches never see the light of the day here. Take my word for it.

Also, you can easily see that when too-CNN news organizations like CNN repent their past wrongdoings and correct their ways, even our own official broadcasters might re-publish their works and thus reward their efforts, even if they still suck!

Example? Here you are. On September 28, Emily Chang, CNN’s correspondent here,  had a meeting with members of our Communist Youth League (共产主义青年团). Of course, her report still contains some hostile lines, such as

The students did arrive with a “minder” of sorts, but he was no older than them and didn’t interrupt the conversation.

How naive! Of course there is always an elder comrade who gives the younger comrades instructions and then some feedback – the elder comrade is either an elder in terms of age and experience, or only in terms of experience. And frankly, answers like the one of Natalie Chen are indicative for everything that is wrong with our system, if you ask me. Look at this mess:

“Do you think everything is fair in China?” I asked Natalie. “At present I have to say no,” she said. “But, we are of course making progress towards it.”

OK, it was sort of the correct answer in ideological terms, because socialism isn’t exactly communism, and only a transitional phase towards Communism, but if it was up to me, she’d be arrested for this answer right away. We are already a very harmonious society, and her answer is therefore disconcerting and subversive. She hasn’t understood that  Harmony is better than Communism, and everybody in our party should understand that by now. Communism is only a foreign concept. Only Harmony is truly Chinese. But what can you expect, so long as wussies like comrade Mingzhao are having a say in our party? It is easy to realize that a lot of work not only on our Great Firewall, but also on the ideological orientation of a few comrades still needs to be done. I mean, look at the girl’s so-called “name”: Natalie (纳塔利). These kids have too many stupid Western ideas in their heads. Even Ma Ying-jeou of the Taiwanese authorities can do without a westernized name, and he’s still a bloody, albeit bootlicking, renegade. I mean, has he restored Taiwan to the motherland yet? Not even close!

But I’m getting distracted…

Of course, the not-too-false answers from our young comrades didn’t satisfy CNN, so they resorted to some sort of imperialist Orientalism once again, and interviewed a foreigner, David Shambaugh, in addition, who said that truths about harmony and so on are

“… all current slogans, but people are not really sure what they mean.”

Obviously, this is too stupid to quote for our own official broadcasters. Of course we aren’t always specific. If we were, we couldn’t accuse people of  deviating from the party line, because knowing the exact party line, they might actually stick to it all the time. In such a specific way, it would be impossible to discipline young party members with strange surnames. A bit of suspense is essential for stability.

But anyway, the message of encouragement we want to offer is that when once biased and hostile forces like CNN correct their ways, we are always benevolent. This is very important, and should be noted by other broadcasters too. This will enhance international friendship and cooperation, and make the world more harmonious.

I’d say that Ms Chang’s work is now 20 per cent good, 80 per cent bad, which is, after all, an improvement. But we will judge America not only by CNN’s progress, but also by what the Washington Post is doing. We won’t forget any of your biased and untrue representations. They have hurt our feelings.

P.S.: I really liked Ms Chang’s suggestion that the Communist Party will still be China’s one and only ruling party 60 years from now.

Take my word for it.

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